Dear Baby~
I'm just waiting waiting waiting for you to kick. My tummy is starting to show a bit, but Emma is still confused that you're in there. She already loves you so much. She is always talking about Tyson and Lydia and often times mentions you in her prayers. When I lay down at night I picture you laying snuggled up on my shoulder. I really hope you have black hair. You're dad is hoping for green eyes and I'm hoping for dimples. But in the end we just want you to be here as part of our family. I've felt like you've been missing for over a year now and I am just so relieved that you'll be here with us for next Christmas. You've been such a good baby. I was never really sick with you, just VERY sleepy at the beginning. Now I feel great. No huge cravings. I can still work out. I sleep comfortably. And we both enjoy a good grapefruit every night. I hope you're nice and comfy in my belly.

Dear Baby,
Today we found out that I am Hypoglycemic. Which means I don't produce enough thyroid. After researching the internet for about an hour I learned that this might have been the reason why it took us so long to get pregnant. My friend Natalie says it took us so long because you were busy up in Heaven and still needed there. Whatever the reason is, I'm just so glad you're finally here. I'm taking pills now so that you can develop strong and healthy and my lack of thyroid won't slow us both down. I sure hope they work in time. See you soon. Love, mom.

Dear Lydia~

A year ago from today your dad and I were on a trip to Thailand. Papa and Annie took the whole family. On our last day there we took a boat out to these Sea Caves called Hongs. At sunset we made these little Kratong's that were filled with fresh flowers, a coconut base, candles and incense. It was a little silly but they told us to make a wish. Your dad and I decided to wish that you, our next sweet little girl would join our family. So we took our little Kratong and we made our wish, for you, Lydia, to come to us in the next year. As we let our Kratong go and float inside the enclosed Lagoon I just thought so hard of you and wanted you there in my arms at that moment. Your dad and I both agreed that it was one of the most romantic moments of our marriage. The water below us had algae that glowed in the night time and fire flies were flying above us. The Lagoon was filled with about 30 other glowing kratong's and very few things I have seen in my life have been as beautiful as that. We were never quite sure exactly when we wanted to start trying for another baby. However, after that night we knew we were ready for you. For the last year I've just felt like our family has had a piece missing from it. I can't even tell you how much peace it gives me to know you're in my belly right now. I have another 5 weeks before the Dr. confirms that you are in fact the little girl I've been waiting for. But for now I just have the feelings in my heart to let me know you're here. I can't even believe how much I love you. We're all waiting for you.

Welcome little one

Dear Baby,
Today was the day I've been waiting nearly a year for. We finally finally had a yes on our pregnancy test. I'm sorry to say that this last year of trying for you, and wanting you so bad, and not getting what I want really changed me. I wavered in my faith and found pity for myself when I didn't deserve it. Your dad however came through stronger than ever. He was the rock of reason that always told me that everything would be okay. He had a chance to attend the Portland Temple in August and he said he just felt great peace over our situation. I am one who needs to know the exact details of every situation, and peace over come what may just wasn't enough for me. It was finally the closing sentence in the conference talk by President Monson that changed my heart. He said "Brothers and sisters, my sincere prayer is that we may adapt to the changes in our lives, that we may realize what is most important, that we may express our gratitude always and thus find joy in the journey. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen." I learned to be thankful for that which I did have. Although I didn't have you I had my sweetest little Emma and your dad who is my very best friend. I changed my whole outlook on life and learned to become grateful for this time that we had to fight to get you. It was 17 days later that I learned that I was pregnant, and I'm so thankful that I had a chance to change my heart before I received the good news.
So I took a pregnancy test in the morning, but I couldn't bare to see the results. If it said "negative" I would just be too sad to go on with my day. So I stuffed the test in the back of my drawer and I met Annie to go walking at the Parkway with Emma. After lunch I came home with Emma and my hand was shaking as I pulled the test out to read the results. I screamed, literally screamed with joy when I saw the positive sign. Emma was so cute to get in on the excitement with me and I'm so glad to have shared that moment with her. Later I made a nice dinner and set the video camera up to show your dad the results. He was just as relieved as I was, except he gets the pride in knowing he never lost his faith. That is a lesson I will always remember him for. We're so glad you're here!!

Where are you?

Dear Baby~
We've been trying to have you join our family for nine months now, and so far we've had no success. I am getting pretty worried that you'll never make it here, at least not by arriving inside my belly. I will be more sad than words can say if I don't get the chance to be pregnant again. We've been to the Dr. and both your dad and I have been tested and our reproductive skills seem to be working in order. So I looked into adoption, but that just doesn't feel right for us at this time. I want you here so bad it's all I ever think about. I'm going to start taking a fertility drug that will help my eggs or something like that. I don't care if you come in a package of 2 or 3, I will do whatever it takes. Although I should be honest, if you came in a package of 4 or more, well that wouldn't be fun for any of us.